My life one week out

I've never been so excited to blog in my life.

I don't think I've ever been this excited in my professional life, period.

Just a week ago today, my life was rocked in an amazing way. I experienced a roller coaster of emotions and just laid it all out on the table. I started to open up to what I want in life, what is holding me back, what makes me feel happy and whole, and what I want to make happen this year and in the years to come. A day of self-reflection so deep, that my head started to hurt. But in the best way possible.

I walked away with a new perspective on life. With a new drive and new enthusiasm for what I'm doing.

I generally don't consider myself easily excitable. It's tough to get me really enthusiastic. But after Lara Casey's Making Things Happen Intensive, I've been the MOST FIRED UP, I've ever been. Ever. About anything in my professional life. And it's such a new feeling to me that I'm still riding on the most amazing natural high even seven days later. It's unlike anything else.

And those who experienced the intensive know what I'm talking about. It's an indescribable feeling, but the feeling is there.

For everyone else - my friends, family, and contacts - have seen this new side of me. And they probably think that I drank the special Kool-Aid or started taking some crazy pills or joined some kind of a cult. Because I haven't always felt this way. And suddenly, pretty much overnight, it's like my life took a SERIOUS 180. Serious.

And I had no idea it was coming.

I've had my lows, and probably my lowest moment was working in a stifling corporate environment. It was the most frustrating experience that I've had in my short existence. I wasn't excited about the work. I wasn't excited about most of the people. I wasn't excited about the company. At all. I had a generally disenchanted sentiment for the entire thing. Managers who didn't listen (except for my one manager who was AMAZING and was my silver lining for the 14 months she worked with me). Budgets that I managed that were three, four, five times my annual salary. Expectations that were completely unachievable. I felt like I was set up for failure.

And I don't think anyone likes that feeling.

I think it's a universal good feeling to succeed. To meet goals and exceed expectations. This was always what I shot for. In high school. In college. Even in France where I didn't understand the grading structure at all. I've always aimed high and shot for success. But after enough time at this company, I felt like I had not progressed in my career at all. I felt like I was shuffling papers for the sake of shuffling. Talking the talk. Playing the game. And all for what? Making other people's bonuses bigger? Are you kidding me?

That was the old me. By the end of my time there, I was just apathetic. I was cynical. I had no kick in my step. I wasn't excited. I was unhappy. My silver lining in it all was that there was a light at the end of the tunnel. It wasn't going to last forever. I had a vision far removed from a cubicle life. I had a vision of bigger and better things that I could define. That I could decide.

So here I am. At a crossroads. And I'm so excited.

While I don't know where this project will take me, I have confidence that it will be an amazing journey. It's total uncharted territory. It reminds me a lot of when I moved to France. I didn't know what I was doing, where I was going, or what kind of experiences were going to change my life for the better. I just knew that I could speak French and would get by.

That's how I feel about this blog. I know that I can write, relaying and sharing experiences that have made me feel like a whole person (like the best version of myself), and hopefully helping just one person find their silver lining - their joie de vivre.

And that if I keep doing it, I will be achieving my goal of helping others find and see the best version of themselves. Because we all have it in us. Deep down. We just need to dig.

If my life can take a 180, I know it's possible to find your joie de vivre.

Merci a tous (thanks everyone),
Catie